Time keeps on tickin'

[rockstarbob.livejournal.com]

my dearest fellow vagina-bearing superstars,

just a reminder to let you know that it's just seven days until v-day and now would be a fab time to do some last-minute v-day shopping at our vaginapagina online store!

for a limited time only, we're featuring special v-day related products, so don't miss out -- in just week, these special items will be gone forever! (but don't worry -- although the designs on the regular merch may change, our online store is here to stay.)

disclaimer: all designs were made by vaginapagina members; we make no profit on the merchandise being sold for us at cafepress.com -- we just want people to love their vaginas!

happy vagina grrl

[evilgoddess1.livejournal.com]

I'm just very at ease with my vagina right now, thought I'd mention that I love her! No more problems! It's pretty and healthy and nice :)

(no subject)

[bizetsy.livejournal.com]

Oh! Am I a moody cranky mess! Right now I feel good, but it's all happy hormones flooding me.

I've had PMS for 2 solid weeks, I reckon. Moodiness, cramps (less severe but longer), major crabbiness. And what I'm wondering is--could this be a result from a big change in diet? I stopped caffeine cold turkey just about a month ago, I cut back on fat, and I've been exercising.

Do you think that my loonnng PMS could have to do with that? Has anyone here experienced similar reactions?

Speaking of v-day...

[gezellig-girl.livejournal.com]

Eve Ensler will be performing 'The Vagina Monologues' on HBO, February 14th at 9:30pm (EST). So, gather your most snatchtacular friends for an evening of girly fun! Or, if you're broke like me, call someone else who has HBO and ask them to tape it for you. (That is, if you can manage to say "vagina" to your dad over the phone... good luck.)

I'm reallllllly upset and NOT doing well/new here

[edrecovery.livejournal.com]

This is largely a cut and paste from my own journal. Having joined this group yesterday due to ;o) vagina issues, I have been debating posting/sharing.

Today, however, made this a necessity.

I know this is a raw post (and out of character for me), but I hope, well . . .

y'all seem like a great community of women.

On the upside, I AM still eating (recovering from an ED and should probably be eating a bit less ;o).

On the downside, I AM falling apart emotionally (and physically).

I just spent the last TWO hours crying, VERY rare.

I actually SERIOUSLY contemplated taking my own life (no more pain, no more docs, no more past, no more "hurting my family" with my injuries or decisions-in this case to wait for a doc who respects me), but, hey, my daughter is home.

Besides, I thought of an alternative. One that isn't so permanent.

So, next best thing, I told my husband I'm leaving-strangely, not because I do NOT love him . . . it's all messed up. For now, though, I stay.

Anyhow, this whole girly thang has me turned inside out. What could be a merely "complicated" situation has gotten all but impossible.

I NEVER SHOULD HAVE TOLD!!!!!!!!!!!

Told what? Okay, I was victim of a brutal, um, "sexual assault" when I was fifteen. I was cut in some not too choice places. Sooooooooooo this doc has badgered me about 1000 times for records after the SA--the PID, the repair. I told him, "NO!" I explained why; I explained again. One of the reasons is because I am involved in litigation about something where they would love to turn up something to turn me into a quivering lump on the stand. They have FREE REIGN on my records due to laws with no-fault. If I don't allow them records, they deny my claim; they would LOVE that. Yes, it has NOTHING to do with it. Well, okay, the thing at 15 doesn't, but this surgery could. I just don't !@#$% care to be interrogated about this.

I told him, "NO!"

I told him, "NO!" again.

I told his nurse "NO!"

I told a fill-in nurse "NO!" and she promised me it was a dead issue that they would let a dead horse lie.

So, why then did his nurse call back today to bug me for THE SAME RECORDS!!!???

So, this jokester has put off caring for me because he wants these records. Did he care about the fourth-degree lacerations (full-thickness) and the repair after I had my daughter SIX YEARS AGO? Um, didn't even ASK for the records. But, did he just HAVE to have the records from TWELVE YEARS AGO, insensitive prick (erhm, sorry)? Hey, I had a friggin vaginal birth AFTER this!!!! (ok, yes, I tore and have a posterior fourchette weakness, but, well?!?!?! maybe he ought check into THIS and screw what did NOT give me trouble!)

I mean he has just went on and on about this! Thanks for reminding me ALL about that doc. For making me feel permanently flawed . . . different . . . I don't know, just . . . WRONG . . . and NOT RESPECTED!

Told the nurse, "NO!" again and said one more word and I switch doctors! He needs to RESPECT my decision. He can even REFUSE to see me. BUT, he needs to leave this alone.

Told her the doc who did my birth didn't know, same with the doc who did the tubal ligation (er, well, until she SAW the damage with her own eyes). They treated me like I was relatively "normal"-k, they noticed some scarring, suggested counseling for what was obviously a major trauma. I'm FINE with that.

Furthermore, I told her, I will NOT EVER share this information AGAIN! My fears WERE REALIZED! They are treating me DIFFERENTLY! Talked about the respect issue. Reminded them about the refusal issue (three times and out doc--ethical).

Then, to add insult to injury, they treated me LIKE A CHILD and CALLED MY HUSBAND AT WORK AND ASKED HIM TO BE THERE TOMORROW after I already told them "thanks, but no, I can handle this on my own." He is !@#$% risking his JOB to be there!

Told hubby this MADE UP MY MIND! I may GO, but only to say I followed through, to get their "opinion," and then I'll go elsewhere for a "second opinion" and get the work done THERE!

Maybe y'all are thinking I'm making a big deal out of nothing too. My mom was baffled; my husband was baffled-that I would face up to a MONTH more pain for . . . what? Well, told them both that the obvious lack of respect for me and the lack of realization that this is MY DAMN BODY (hubby does NOT need to APPROVE of my hysterectomy, though he will--he told me today he had to approve the tubal ligation or they wouldn't have done it :O0 Whose !@#$%ing body is this anyway?! Obviously hubby and I decided this TOGETHER, just as we did this, but it shouldn't !@#$%ing MATTER TO THE DOCTOR WHAT MY HUSBAND THINKS!!!!! MY BODY, mine mine mine! At twenty-one I didn't quite understand that yet. I was still a victim. "Yes, whatever you say/think is best/etc." I had little regard for ME!, my needs . . . sure, I still consider my husband, my daughter . . . they are a "part" of "me," an important part of my life. Me does equal my roles and responsibilities . . . but I AM learning to take care of ME. My being emotionally devastated but fixed physically would do little for the good of ME OR MY FAMILY!

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Besides, with my rare condition, I do NOT need a doc who does not respect my wishes. All I need his him bowing to the hospital and their expectation that since it is a teaching hospital such rare things ought be shared. Well, NO! I have issues with being in the lithotomy position (pelvic position) while TIED DOWN (pegged the anesthesiologist for not warning me and restraining me, normal so as no to interrupt the sterile field, before I was completely out--I mean I was BARELY with it, they were SHOCKED . . . it was reaction), free for the view to any they might choose to bring through. Just cuz I say "no" doesn't mean this doc listens or wouldn't pressure me before/after. I know of docs who disregard the patients' wishes when the cost seems to great to the "greater good." They just swear everyone to secrecy. Hey, not in this small town. People I haven't told have already heard of my anomaly (unicornuate uterus without rudimentary horn/uterus, missing ovaries on both sides).

Any thoughts?

anxiety.....arg!

[quietgrrl.livejournal.com]

so i keep getting really bad anxiety and sometimes anxiety attacks the first couple of days of my period. this is a recent thing and i was wondering if anyone knew of anyways i could correct this (sans going on the pill or something unnatural like that). is there something i could do to change my diet or some homeopathic way to treat this?

i remember someone had mentioned earlier on this list that progestin imbalance can create anxiety. is there anyway to balance that?

(no subject)

[trocar.livejournal.com]

Grrrr.. Don't remember when my last post was.. BUt i was bitching cause i had my period yet again. I think it was last week.. Well the period thing finished, and the pap smear was fine... But the period is back. Which is pissing me off royaly. It is great to get your period.. Means i am not pregnent! LO>< (WHich would be impossible right now)
But i am so upset. I am going through a fortune in tampons/pads... Just feeling tired and miserable most of the time. all i wanna do is cry, eat or sleep...
Grrrr

how to encourage menstrual flow

[quietgrrl.livejournal.com]

i am posting this because a lady had mentioned earlier that she was trying to encourage menstrual flow. i figured i'd post it here so that it can be archived and everyone can read it rather than being tucked away in the comments section.

*note* this is for amenorrhea (absence of menses) not for abortion.

this is copied directly from hot pants by the ladies at blood sisters.

amenorrhea can be caused by very poor diet, excessive exercising, losing large amounts of weight, fatigue, stress, hormonal imbalance, going off the pill, or by metabolic problems: diabetes, liver disease, inconsistencies in thyroid levels.

Try to eat well.

To bring on menstruation.

a sprig of parsley inserted as far as possible into the vagina can bring on menstration by causing uterine contractions. Insert it before going to sleep, and remove it the following morning. Do this for 3 to 4 days. Accompany this with parsley infusions.

Take sage in infusion or tincture.

drink motherwort infusions for 4 to 5 days. Do not exceed 6 days; you should get your period in the following days.

Massage the reflex zones for uterus and ovaries 2 or 3 times a day (see below)

tansy in infusion or tincture can help regulate amenorhea. Note that tansy can cause heavy bleeding in women who normally have a heavy flow.

If you suffer regularly from amenorhea or late periods, it would be better for you to think in terms of a more holistic treatment instead of simply trying to bring on you period. Consult an herbalist, or try homeopathic remedies or other alternative medicines. Drinking sage and red raspberry leaf teas on a regular basis can help improve this condition, as they help tone the uterus and ovaries.

Foot Massage (great for alleviating cramps):
Massage the uterine and ovarian reflex areas (located behind the ankles, just above the heel). Press hard where it hurts. This area is generally very sensitive at the onset of menstration. Use your thumb to put firm pressure on the area, for five minutes on each side. Alternate massaging each foot, as needed. This massage yields astonishing results, especially if it's done by someone else.

(no subject)

[shellyday.livejournal.com]

has anyone read Spiritual Midwifery by Ina May Gaskin?. today i took it off my shelf to brouse a bit and was reminded of it's beauty.

also i just want to express how much i appreciate this community. I don't often post, but i learn so much great stuff reading people's posts. thanks everyone for making it a hoppin' community.

(no subject)

[shellyday.livejournal.com]

has anyone read Spiritual Midwifery by Ina May Gaskin?. today i took it off my shelf to brouse a bit and was reminded of it's beauty.

also i just want to express how much i appreciate this community. I don't often post, but i learn so much great stuff reading people's posts. thanks everyone for making it a hoppin' community.

Update, thx for the support y'all

[edrecovery.livejournal.com]

I feel a little strange admitting this, though I don't know why . . . I started seeing a therapist. I decided it would be good to talk about the disability issue and have a place to vent "safely."

Anyhow, my third appointment was tonight at 7 EST.

I told her all about the doc thing, in even more detail than you got ;o) and she was PISSED! She said he DEFINITELY crossed ethical boundaries (not respecting my wishes, manipulating others to do his bidding, etc. etc.), and if I allowed him to care for me after that I am allowing him to "victimize" me. She said many docs have a "god complex," frankly they think they are demi-gods. She is SO happy I'm not willing to put up with his BS. (Heads up to the other VP gal who called me "strong.")

Anyhow, I fessed up to wondering if he has that complex BECAUSE he is good. He is certainly one of the few practiced and qualified people to do laparascopically-assisted vaginal hysterectomies.

Sooooooooooo, what will it be? Quick fix, help the fam, lose self respect . . . skilled physician (I'm sure there are others).

Keeping my appointment tomorrow out of self-preservation (insurance). If things don't work out I'll go to a different practice/hospital (all the other OB/GYNs in this town work for the SAME office-small town, monopoly).

Wellllllll, hubby's turn.

(no subject)

[hissyfit.livejournal.com]

email i just received about auctioning my vulva pillows during the vagina monologues here on campus:

Just wanted to let you know that i told the Feb. Sisters group about the pillows today and they LOVED the idea. They asked if it would be possible to make 4 - two for the Friday night performance and two for Saturday night. If you are not able to complete that many in time I understand and will take however many you can do. We can discuss other details tomorrow after class...thanks so much for the offer and for your enthusiasm about the project as a whole.