awkward 1st time sex, condom, uk BC question

[elanor-g.livejournal.com]

Hi, I'm a long time lurker to VP and I know you ladies give great advice.

My thing is this, my boyfriend and me have started taking our relationship to the next level.  Today we attempted having sex but didn't work, the thing is he's not that experianced but niether am I but I know what gets me goin.  He's just pressin buttons randomly, I tried guiding his hand to where I like it but its kinda frustrating, any advice to share?

We were using the durex performa condoms, whats everyone's experiances with them?  Any sugestions on what brand of condoms to get?  

Oh and is BC in the uk free on the nhs?

Comments

[daddysaysto.livejournal.com]

My favorite advice, if he hasn't done this already, is to get his face down between your legs and get his bearings. Let him poke around a bit. Help him find the vagina, point out the clitoris, let him move your labia around, gently tug here and there and see what looks like what and how everything works. And while he's down there, he should pay the favor back by spending a little oral time down there.

More than a good time, it's good for him to literally SEE where everything is and have him touch you so he can see what his fingers are touching and where he needs to move when he's reaching down there when he can't see (like when he's trying to guide his penis into you). Plus, while he's down there, take the time to let him watch you masturbate. Have him take over a couple times and let him explore, then guide him back to doing what you want and what works best. CONSTANTLY praise him when he's doing this.

Guys, especially teenaged guys, are like puppies in that we will do anything as long as we're being told what good boys we are and how much you like what we're doing and how strong and smart we are. Once he's used to all the positive feedback, you can back off a little bit from it to let him try to figure out how to get that same response, and when you give it to him again, he'll redouble his efforts to hear it again. It will take a little more time, but by training him with this positive reinforcement, he'll do whatever it is you want because he'll want to see you smile and hear the praise and admiration in your voice.

By the way, this isn't even remotely supposed to sound like I'm being condescending toward men. It's simply true that, in general, we appreciate being praised and will go to extraordinary lengths to be seen as useful and very able to satisfy our partners.

[elanor-g.livejournal.com]

Thankyou, Reading your reply all I can see is my bf down between my legs with a magnifying glass and me holding a leash, I know it sounds stupid but I know what you're saying :D

[daddysaysto.livejournal.com]

*snickering* Well, I dunno about the magnifying glass, but the leash sounds like fun!

But hey, if your guy is into magnifying glasses, go for it! *giggling*

That's okay, when I was writing it I kept seeing little stickers that said "Hello! My name is Labia Majora" "Hello! My name is Urinary Tract"