my partner has herpes

[-birkenstock.livejournal.com]

ok, we just found out that my fiancee has genital herpes.  i know that there is no 100% safe sex.. but i have a few questions regarding what is safer.

he has only had one outbreak, one small thing that blistered over and has now scabbed, and a little redness on the tip of his penis. 

obviously, we know not to have sex while he is having an outbreak, or if one is coming on.  does this include him performing oral sex on me?  he has never had a cold sore or anything, can it still be transmitted?  should we avoid oral sex all together, during an outbreak or not?

how long after the scab heals is it considered ok to have sex?

Comments

(frozen) Safe Space Warning

[mangofandango.livejournal.com]

Hi! I'm writing on behalf of the VP Team to express concern that the attitude and/or wording above do not foster what we consider safe space (http://www.vaginapagina.com/index.php?title=VaginaPagina_FAQ#What_is_.22Safe_Space.22.3F) in this community. Specifically, when you tell the OP she should break up with her partner if she does not test positive for herpes, you're implying that people with herpes are damaged and not worth being with, and you're also making a huge judgment about the OP's relationship and personal values.

Please consider this a warning as well as a friendly reminder to take this opportunity to review VP's policies. You can find more information on safe space (http://www.vaginapagina.com/index.php?title=VaginaPagina_FAQ#What_is_.22Safe_Space.22.3F) in our FAQ (http://www.vaginapagina.com/index.php?title=VaginaPagina_FAQ), as linked here:

--What are VP's rules? (http://www.vaginapagina.com/index.php?title=VaginaPagina_FAQ#What_are_the_rules.3F)
--What is "safe space"? (http://www.vaginapagina.com/index.php?title=VaginaPagina_FAQ#What_is_.22Safe_Space.22.3F)
--What do you mean by "empowerment" and why is it important in VP? (http://www.vaginapagina.com/index.php?title=VaginaPagina_FAQ#What_do_you_mean_by_.22empowerment.22_and_why_is_it_important_in_VP.3F)

You are more than welcome to make a post over in contact_vp or to contact us via email (http://www.vaginapagina.com/contact.php) If you'd like to talk more about this matter or clarify any points; we only ask that you refrain from commenting further here out of respect for the OP. For that reason, replies to this thread will be frozen.

mangofandango
For the VP Team (http://www.vaginapagina.com/contact.php)
contact_vp