is it normal for intercourse to be painful at first?

[chipie.livejournal.com]

Where do you all stand on the should-intercourse-be-painful-at-first debate?  (A debate that may or may not only exist in my head.)

I've always believed that there was no reason why first-time intercourse would be painful.  Especially if you've been sexually active before, use lots of lube, are turned on, have no problems with tampons or fingers, etc.

But that's what I did when I first started having intercourse, and it was still really painful.  Since then, over the course of one year or so, I've probably had/attempted intercourse about 20 times, maybe more.  The pain I've been having basically feels like there just isn't enough room in my vagina, if that makes sense.  Nothing seems to help it and it hasn't gotten better with time.

I've now given up (temporarily, I hope) because I don't think it should be this painful, and I don't like birth control.  But I also wonder if the pain was normal.  Maybe if I had just kept going it would eventually have gone away?

What do you all think?  It is normal for intercourse to be painful the first few/many times?  Or does that signal a problem? 

(I am going to see a doctor about it anyway, but I'm just wondering what the consensus is on this.  My friends are really divided, and I'm confused!)

Comments

[punchbunz.livejournal.com]

and, hey, if your doctor doesn't give you an answer that you feel is satisfactory, seek another opinion. no two people think the same way; don't feel dejected or forced to accept that it's just in your head if your doctor laughs at you.

i've got many therapist friends and no two agree on very much. some people bring personal hang-ups or beliefs to work that should be checked at the door. if this doctor doesn't seem like someone you can work with, try interviewing a few gynecologists or even going to Planned Parenthood until you're sure you've got a good match.