orgasm? whats that?

[thekat03.livejournal.com]

ok, so i do know what an orgasm is... well... sort of...
i technically know what an orgasm is, but i'm not quite sure what one *feels* like...
now, this means either 1) i have never had an orgasm, or 2) i have orgasms, but dont realize that i have them or cant identify them

seeing as ive constantly read/heard that "if you dont know if you've had an orgasm or not, then you havent," followed by this flood of advice on things to try that i have tried and that should give me that mindblowing experience that is clearly an orgasm... but it doesnt
but i dont really want to accept that saying as truth, because that implies to me that i'm missing out on something really great or that i'm "broken" because i cant orgasm... and i dont think that's true
either way, ive decided that this isnt a "problem" per se, since regardless of whether i orgasm or not, i'm having a lot of fun and think sex feels really good
however, after reading comments from a previous post and discovering that "i'm not the only one!", i got up the guts to actually proclaim all this to the world! (or at least to livejournal)

anyhow, now that that's done, i was wondering if those of you lucky people who do have orgasms could describe what they feel like? (:
just so i can maybe compare notes and see if i really am having orgasms but just dont know it
or if you dont have orgasms (or are like me and dont quite know for sure) chime in too if youd like... i'm curious to know other peoples experiences and how you deal/dealt with this

Comments

[crushdmb.livejournal.com]

it's hard to explain, and i'm sure it's different for everyone. i'm trying to come up with the words to explain it, but i can't.

have you tried vibrators, or porn, to perhaps get you excited enough to have an orgasm?

a good sex toy site is goodvibes.com .. i just ordered from them, and they have a good selection of toys that aren't too expensive. :)

[thekat03.livejournal.com]

and come as you are (http://www.comeasyouare.com i think) is another nice place and where i got my vibe, though i did also look at a lot of other sex-positive toy stores as well, and will probably be purchasing another vibe (or maybe a dildo or something else interesting) next time i can afford to
visual porn (videos and pictures) doesnt do a whole lot for me, but text porn (aka erotica) is definitely interesting... but its just good at getting me horny... nothing else d:

[mangofandango.livejournal.com]

Let's see...orgasms are hard to describe, and I assume that they differ for everyone, but let me try to explain what mine feel like.

I had them when I was younger without knowing what they were (and I didn't know I was masturbating either). Then I thought of the feeling as sort of a warm tingly feeling that got...bigger, and went through my whole body, then sort of...slid back down to normal again.

And now, I think of it as a sort of building feeling still, and as it builds I can move it along towards a big explosion, where my muscles sort of tighten way up and then relax and the feeling comes in big waves and then small ones. I use a vibrator sometimes during sex, and I tighten my Kiegels and so on, so depending on what I'm/we're doing the feeling varies a bit. But that's the gist of it. Does that...sound familiar at all? :)

hmm, this is long. hope it's helpful :)

[isolt.livejournal.com]

Physically, my body goes into overdrive shaking and convulsing. Orgasm is the release of the tension that's built up during arousal. My boyfriend/partner also says that he can feel the muscles in my vagina contract rapidly, but I'm never consciously aware of it. I'm too busy thrashing ;). I also tend to scream a lot - the screaming for me is as much a part as the thrashing for releasing the tension, though other people are capable of coming silently.

Mentally, everything shuts down. The outer world recedes almost completely. During a mediocre orgasm, I'm typically only aware of the sensations of my body. During a fantastic orgasm, it's like I dissolve into the darkness itself, becoming one with everything. It only took me one really great orgasm to understand why people sometime get mystical about sex.

As for the dictum you take issue with, I'd wager it's not entirely true. It's true that the best orgasms are unmistakable Experiences, but orgasms come along a continuum of strong to weak. The stronger the orgasm, the more my mind is involved, and the stronger the physical release, and vice versa. A weak orgasm could easily pass unnoticed. A lot of orgasms aren't particularly spectacular, as well. Don't expect every time to be a devastating, mind-shattering Experience.

Along these lines, I will say that the first time I ever had an orgasm, it took me about 3 days to figure out precisely what had happened to me, even though I was 18 and had known about orgasms for many years before. I'd say that if you're having fun during sex and your partner is paying sufficient attention to your clit, then don't worry. Just relax, enjoy yourself, and it'll probably happen one day. I'd also say, based on my experience, to get a vibrator if you don't already have one. I have a hell of a time making myself come with my hands, but a vibrator works wonders, and I know I've not been the only girl out there with this quirk.

[bigfatkitty.livejournal.com]

I agree totally that there are degrees of orgasm. The completely great ones do kinda force you into black out. But usually, it's a warm tingle, spreading from your clit and vagina. Makes my legs weak, and I feel it up my spine. Depending on what's going on (what kind of sex) each thrust kind of pushes the orgasm a little farther. Now lately...I don't get to that place where everything lets go, so I'm getting kinda tense lol. But ideally, the warm shockwaves of pleasure build n build, til something just starts to break, then there is some more moaning, possibly screaming and everything feels wonderful. And you try to stand and your thighs just quiver. Then you know it was good, even if it doesn't classify as everyone else's orgasm, lol. Basically that's the truth, if you keep trying things, and pushing your pleasure til you just can't take it anymore, and you let your self come, then that's the orgasm part to me, whether technically it is or not.

[pillu.livejournal.com]

mine are pretty much like that too. My breathing ussualy gets faster, and I start to get all quivery, and the moaning/screaming usualy gets louder, until I kinda tense up and scream fairly loud, then I start to calm down. Ussualy thats the end, but If my guy is in a good mood It does that over and over again in waves

[katlynel.livejournal.com]

When I was first masturbating and orgasmed without knowing what they were, all I was aware of was that things would feel better and better and better and then all of a sudden I'd want to stop. It was years before I figured out that was an orgasm.

As a side note, I never orgasm during intercourse, only from masturbation or oral sex. And a lot of women are like that. I'd really, really recommend the purchase of a good clitoral vibrator. Vaginal vibration doesn't do much for me, but the first time I put a vibrator on my clit was a revelation for me. It's a sensation I can't compare to anything else in the world. If you're a bit bewildered by the array of vibrators out there, consider getting one of the big plug-in wand massagers with the tennis ball sized heads, as those work great on your clitoris. I saw them at the Discovery Channel store a week or two ago.

[linzbinz.livejournal.com]

I always have clitoral orgasms...which I can pretty much only get from a vibrator, but occasionally from sex. Oh, and just so you know, something like 75% of women can't orgasm through sex alone, so don't feel like you're broken or anything. :) Anyway, my orgasms kind of build up, and then my vagina contracts and releases really quickly, and feels like it's melting, then afterwards, my whooole vaginal region is really sensitive, but I'm REALLY relaxed.

[boysfeartotread.livejournal.com]

Ever see Star Wars? It's kind of like the end of the movie where the climax of it all is when Luke is flying his little space ship to the core of the Deathstar. The dramatics excite everyone, he's nearing the core, he dodges danger, avoids Darthvadors death shooter things, nears the core some more and then BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! Nails that core hard! And then the movie ends. That's me anyway...My life is a friggen joke when i think about it.

i agree

[yourhottie18.livejournal.com]

i too am wondering the same things you are...thanks for asking :)