Links Round Up: Week Ending 30 August 2014

[frolicnaked.livejournal.com]

For folks who don't know, the LRU is a compilation of items from the past week that may be of interest to VPers and is intended to broaden the kinds of conversations we have here.

Note: Due to time commitments and conflicts, the LRU will be going on temporary but indeterminate hiatus. We'll be back with more great links once we've had a bit of time to sort out schedules!

As a reminder, in lieu of trigger warnings, I use keywords describing the themes of the piece. Please skim these before deciding to read the excerpt or click through for the full article. Outside sources are not safe spaces, and mainstream sources' comments should almost always be avoided. The links I highlight don't necessarily reflect VP's views, or even my own, for that matter.

This week's round-up includes: is the movement to take rape seriously ruining sex lives?, the idea of "caveman courtship," self advocacy for disabled people, a new one size fits all diaphragm, and reactions to appearance changes.

1. College dudes worried that movement to take rape seriously is ruining their sex lives by Colleen McDonough at Salon (Keywords: rape, rape culture, consent, victim blaming, sex, relationships, mental health stigma)
   

   And here again is the trouble with how we talk about sex, consent and sexual violence in the United States. There are so many ways to flirt and have really enjoyable casual sex without being predatory, but we never talk about them. The importance of listening to the person you’re interested in having sex with and being alert to non-verbal cues certainly isn’t being taught in schools, and this kind of thing generally isn’t modeled in pop culture. So we have a vacuum about relationships and healthy sexuality.

   
   


2. Caveman Courtship and Its Mythology by Lisa Wade, PhD, at Sociological Images (Keywords: feminism, equality, society, rape culture)
   

   The idea of caveman courtship, in other words, seems silly and innocuous. But it actually helps to naturalize men’s aggressive pursuit of sex with women. And that naturalization is part of why it is so difficult to disrupt rape myths and stop rape.

   
   


3. Self Advocacy For Disabled Pepole by C.D. at Culturally Disoriented (Keywords: ableism, self advocacy, discrimination, employment, health care)
   

   The reason why I disagree with the statement “self-advocacy is an important skill to learn, particularly for [people] with disabilities” is because it makes individuals responsible for an institutional problem.
   And because it doesn’t work.
   When you hit roadblock after roadblock
   when you’re humiliated again and again

   
   


4. #whatyounevertaught - the inadequacy of sex education compiled by siwan at storify (Keywords: sex education, sex, shame, menstruation, consent, sexual assault)
   

   A collection of experiences from people failed by school sex and relationship education. Thank you so much to everyone who participated in the hashtag and to the people whose tweets provided the inspiration for it.

   
   


5. Let’s Talk Contraception: The One-Size Diaphragm, a New Contraceptive by Rebecca at Planned Parenthood Advocates of Arizona (Keywords: birth control, diaphragm, sex, safer sex, ciscentric language)
   

   In June of 2013, a new barrier contraceptive, the SILCS diaphragm, entered the market in Europe, and in May of this year, it became available in Canada. The new diaphragm is called the Caya contoured diaphragm, and it’s being marketed as “not your mother’s diaphragm.” This is exciting because Caya is a user-friendly, one-size diaphragm that can fit most users without the need of a pelvic exam. It is being sold through pharmacies and health care providers.

   
   


6. I Dressed as a Goth, a Party Girl, and a Manic Pixie Dream Girl -- Here's How My Friends, Partner, and OKCupid Reacted Marie Southard Ospina at Bustle (Keywords: gender, appearance, fashion, stereotypes, mental health stigma)
   

   For our final project, we were assigned to do something outside our comfort zones with the intent to elicit reactions from those around us, as well as to learn something about ourselves. Because I was friends with the emo/goth hybrid kids in high school, I decided to spend a day as one of them, aesthetically anyway. Black hair, black lips, red and black eye shadow, incredibly thick eyeliner, spiked chains and Hot Topic clothes (this was back when Hot Topic sold actual alternative-wear, mind you). And what I found was the not-so-shocking realization that humans are pretty cruel.

   
   (Thanks to bluexashxtree for the link!)

As always, feel free to share your thoughts on these stories, along with whatever you've been reading or writing this week.