is it normal for intercourse to be painful at first?

[chipie.livejournal.com]

Where do you all stand on the should-intercourse-be-painful-at-first debate?  (A debate that may or may not only exist in my head.)

I've always believed that there was no reason why first-time intercourse would be painful.  Especially if you've been sexually active before, use lots of lube, are turned on, have no problems with tampons or fingers, etc.

But that's what I did when I first started having intercourse, and it was still really painful.  Since then, over the course of one year or so, I've probably had/attempted intercourse about 20 times, maybe more.  The pain I've been having basically feels like there just isn't enough room in my vagina, if that makes sense.  Nothing seems to help it and it hasn't gotten better with time.

I've now given up (temporarily, I hope) because I don't think it should be this painful, and I don't like birth control.  But I also wonder if the pain was normal.  Maybe if I had just kept going it would eventually have gone away?

What do you all think?  It is normal for intercourse to be painful the first few/many times?  Or does that signal a problem? 

(I am going to see a doctor about it anyway, but I'm just wondering what the consensus is on this.  My friends are really divided, and I'm confused!)

Comments

[chipie.livejournal.com]

What do you mean, "anatomically and physiologically"? My understanding was that anatomically a vagina should be able to stretch without too much trouble?

Thanks!

[frolicnaked.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure if this is what fullof_secrets meant, but there are some variations. For example, some folks have minimal or no hymen when they first have penetrative sex while some might have a thicker or more resistant hymen. That can affect pain levels despite being aroused and lubricated.

Additionally, while aroused vaginae doe stretch, some stretch to be longer than others. For example, if the measurement of my favorite vibrator is spot on, my aroused vagina never gets past the 4.5 inch mark. Coupled with a low cervix day, that can make for some pretty tricky intercourse navigation. And while I know that now and can plan for it, it's definitely something I didn't know when I first started having penetrative sex.