This is the most undetailed post ever ...

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

but, I think I have a phobia of masturbation! No I'm not jokin. Wtf is wrong with me?

Comments

[vdoeschallenge.livejournal.com]

hmm are you actually afraid to do it? You could just be feeling embarrassed because female masturbation isn't talked about a lot in society...I know I was for a long time.
I'm not going to dismiss the fact that you might have a phobia either...that could be the case.

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

I can touch around the area, but I've never actually successfully got a finger in.

[vdoeschallenge.livejournal.com]

Oh well I don't masturbate by putting a finger in my vagina, just by touching the clit usually. Try doing that until you are really aroused and then you might be able to get a finger in if that's what you want.

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I way prefer my touching my clit ... I just don't feel that sexy though when I'm alone!

[paperispatient.livejournal.com]

Do you mean that the idea really scares you and freaks you out? Or are you just not interested in it? I feel like we need to know more about you and how you're feel to be able to say anything helpful to you. :)

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

Well yeah I am interested, I have been fingered by guys many many times, but I don't know why I can't do it.

[zanylikethat.livejournal.com]

My ride is waiting outside impatiently so if this comes off garbled because I'm hurrying, I apologize!

I just NEED to say... There is nothing wrong with you!

I'm 23, and most of my close female friends range in age from about 19 to 28, plus I'm super-close with my mum, who is 59. Most of these women, including my mum up until a few years ago, are horrified by the idea of masturbation. They think it's inappropriate, scary, dirty, anything like that. They're a little scared of their vulva region in general.

In short, if you're feeling like you have a phobia because you're grossed out or a little ashamed in general... that's not at all "not normal" and there's nothing wrong with you! I'm sure tons of the great contributors here will jump in with way more detailed explanations and assistance, but I just wanted to back them up with the "there's definitely nothing wrong with you" chorus. :)

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

Thank you!
It's just that I don't find it inappropiate or dirty. I were false nails a lot, maybe that could be a reason I find it a bit scary, and I don't have a lock on my door, but I would like to be able to do it, but a lot of the time I guess I don't feel sexy by myself. I would love to do it in front of my bf, but then there is a lot of pressure since I don't really ever do it.

[daysees.livejournal.com]

I would say there's nothing really wrong! I'm 23 and I've never once done that, primarily because of disinterest! :)

[catiekat.livejournal.com]

This. I find masturbating kind of boring. The whole reason I like sex is the interaction with another person!

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

Thank you!
I do want to do it though ... well I don't know I think I do :-S

[hadespuppy.livejournal.com]

I don't think anyone can answer that for you without more information. for example, what about it do you fear? do you come from a religious background? How do you feel about sex?

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

Yeah I know that this post is really general, I dodn't know what questions I would need to asnwer, so I'm happy your asking me.

1. Well I guess that it will hurt
2. I am in that 17 year old phase of not knowing my exact beliefs, I was baptised, received communion and confirmed as a Catholic. And I do believe in God just not as much as I used to.
3. Yeah I'm a virgin ... well I've done it twice from behind, got fingured a lot by a lot of different boys, I've given about 4 different boys blow jobs, I've been licked out a lot of times by one boy (this plesures me way more than anything else), oh and I've pulled off a considerable amount of boys and yes I have went with/kissed ... :-S far far far too many to count. And only showed one boy my boobs ... there we go!

[archangelbeth]

Even if it's a totally "irrational" phobia... Hey, I have a phobia about spiders. The only thing "wrong" with you may well be... that you have a phobia! (Come in, join the club! Well, unless you have claustrophobia. You'll have to sit outside in that case.)

If it's a phobia that upsets you, because you'd like to not have it, various counseling tactics may be helpful, and/or it may have a subconscious reason that you could root out (which would probably allow you to smack yourself on the forehead, eventually, and move past it).

[coldliberation.livejournal.com]

hey, ain't nothing wrong with a phobia of spiders. they're icky and scary haha. but I agree with your comment.

[aspirituntamed.livejournal.com]

This.

Also,
(Come in, join the club! Well, unless you have claustrophobia. You'll have to sit outside in that case.)

Haha, as a slightly claustrophobic person, this made me laugh. That's great!

[necromance.livejournal.com]

As someone with pediophobia (fear of mannequins and dolls, seriously, just typing out the 'm' word is creeping me out) I understand having a silly phobia and feeling silly.

I totally agree with this statement that if you do have an actual irrational fear of masturbation some phobia counseling would be very beneficial. If's it's something that just makes you uncomfortable or you don't like, then that's okay. Not everyone has to like to masturbate and it doesn't make you weird for not like it.

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

I used to have a phobia of the porclein dolls ... awh their creepy little fuckers!

I have like so so so many phobias I mean it is embrassing!

Belly-buttons *BOKE*

I'm tryin to figure out if its actually a phobia or not :-S

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

Could it be anything to do with the first time I was fingured?

[archangelbeth]

If you had a painful time of it, physically, emotionally, or both... I don't see why that wouldn't trigger an issue.

I see from the comments that you mostly mean penetration. Is it a phobic reaction of "emotional anxiety" or is it more "I don't really like the texture"? I could care less about my own texture, frankly; while I like penetration with my clitoral stimulation, I prefer to use "toys" of some kind for it, not fingers. Fingernails are also tricky to manage without scratching myself slightly.

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

Well, the first time it was done to me, it was done by a boy that was 5 years older (at least). I was in the wee innocent phase. I met him on the saturady, and kissed him, he took me round a corner, and he promised he wouldn't try anything and he didn't. Then we met the next night, I stupidly got into his car by myself. And he fingured me, it felt great at the time. He pulled down his jeans and grabed my hand and you know, tried to get me to give him a handjob, which I had no idea how to do!

Then he never text me again! Haven't heard of him since!

[archangelbeth]

If you felt unhappy and confused... Could be a trigger there, yeah. I'm not a licensed therapist, though, and trying to do it over the net... Would be really hard. Have you considered looking for a professional in phobias/anxieties to talk it out with? (If you don't have the option... Writing everything down about it, about your feelings during it, etc., making sure that you have every single thing remembered about it -- that might help you bring the memory into your conscious control, so you aren't letting your subconscious push you around. Then, if you have parents around who'd freak, you can burn the paper. O:> )

Luck!

[ohoctopi.livejournal.com]

i used to believe that i would have the worst day ever after i masturbated.

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

are you being sarcastic? :-S

[archangelbeth]

(Even if that poster was (and I'd doubt it, personally) -- there are a lot of ranges of reactions to masturbation! Some people get very sad. I wouldn't be at all surprised if someone had that belief.

BTW, if you're ever concerned that you've gotten an inappropriate response to a post (or comment!), the best action is to go check out contact_vp. If your concern isn't there, post it, and the mods will put their Group Brain together and figure out if there's an issue that they can deal with, issue warnings if needed, or take a little time personally to address an issue as commenters themselves in a slightly less official capacity.)

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

sorry, I've only had LJ 2 weeks and I'm from Ireland, so I can't always pick up on what people mean when they say certain stuff. Sorry!

[applefaerie.livejournal.com]

I used to believe that my cramps during my period were so bad because God was punishing me for masturbating. I used to sit and swear to God that if he'd just make the cramps stop, I'd never masturbate again. We all know how that story ends... ;)

Needless to say, I do not believe this anymore, but when I was 16 and more inclined to believe in a damning God, boy howdy did I ever believe that I'd done something wrong!

Nowadays I'm just bored to tears by masturbating, I genuinely need someone else doing something to me that I can't control. It's the element of surprise that gets me off, and it's terribly hard to surprise yourself, even if you sit on your hand until it's numb XD

[catiekat.livejournal.com]

I'm in the same boat. I do it more often now because I realise it's the best way to learn about my sexuality and what turns me on, but when I was younger, oh boy! I used to get soooo embarassed and angry when people would bring it up. It just grossed me out. I don't ever remember being told it was wrong; it kinda seems like an idea I developed myself. Now that I'm older (24 yrs.) the only thing that creeps me out about it is the feeling. I don't really like the insides of bodies (skeletons, mucus membranes, etc.) so sometimes I get grossed out, but a virbrator has helped with that because then I don't have to use my fingers! Also, I'm a little afraid I might damage myself. Everything's so delicate down there, right? Anyway, trying to figure out the exact reasons why it bothers me has helped me.

[tokio.livejournal.com]

I'm pretty similar with the insides of bodies. It's difficult to explain, but I feel as though there's something almost sacred about it. When people talk about touching their cervix, I get a chill and I become nauseated, which I feel is really ridiculous because I'm extremely open about sexuality and bodies. I think it may be because, the first or second time I had sex, my cervix was hit and it hurt so much I cried.

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry, it might be the difference in culture or maybe I am a retard ...

your cervix is?

I have heard the word, I don't know the names of everything down there

[archangelbeth]

Don't worry! Ignorance is not brain damage. (My brother was in a coma due to brain damage, for years before he died; I assure you that there's a difference. *wry grin*) I'm not tokio, but I am up way too early and looooove answering questions. Bap me if I'm annoying!

Your cervix is, basically, the gateway between your vaginal canal and your uterus. It's technically part of the uterus, according to wikipedia, and this cutaway anatomy diagram (possibly not strictly worksafe) shows where it is -- the little 11 seems to be pointing to it, but is actually pointing to the pocket next to it.

(Also, I seem to remember that the uterus depicted in that drawing is actually slightly "tipped." Many people find that their cervix seems to be a little more more on the "wall" of the vagina closer to their bellybuttons than their spine. Also, people's cervixes often move "up" and "down" depending on where they are in their menstrual cycles! Sometimes it's only an inch or two away from the vaginal opening.)

(As another note, the vagina isn't a "tube" the way that illustration seems to imply. It's hollow, yes, but it only expands into tube-shape when something's inserted. The rest of the time, it's collapsed down, like a pocket inside a stuffed toy.)

The cervix tends to be very sensitive in many women; jostling it during sex can cause pain, and pap smears can be uncomfortable 'cause they're messing with it. Some people are less sensitive, and some actually find cervical stimulation pleasurable!

If you wind up reaching in there, the cervix tends to feel much smoother than the rest of the vaginal canal, and is a semi-firm bump rather like the end of one's nose, about the size of the bony point of an elbow. There's a dimple in the middle (the entry into the uterus, which stays teenytiny save when hormones of childbirth encourage it to dilate; that's what all the "mumble centimeters dilated" means in hospital scenes).

More data than you wanted to know?

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

Thanks but

yes a little more than I wanted to know!

My auntie said to me yesterday that I was the most squemish person she knows ... its pretty unvelievable.

Okay, about to be sick, inside of bodies = BOKE!

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

Thank you ... much appreciated!

[tacky-tramp.livejournal.com]

If you're genuinely curious about what's going on, you'll have to relate some more information. How do you feel when you think about masturbation? What thoughts occur to you?

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

I don't really feel anything towards masturbation, I just feel "I can't do this"

I would think it would be really sexy to do it in front of my boyfriend but because I don't do it alone, it kinda feels like a lot of pressure to do it infront of him.

[tamoria.livejournal.com]

Thank you .. thats sweet!