I didn't really decide. The guy I'm with now is pretty much my first and only in everything, and I had come from a religious background so at first I was nervous about even kissing (which was silly, considering I looooved masturbation and thinking about doing tons of sexual acts). But things just went so well with him that I kissed him first, we had makeout sessions that week, started dry humping the week after, took our shirts off the week after that, and then by a month I felt comfortable giving him handjobs/blowjobs. It only took half a week after that for me to let him try and get me off, and after that it was mutual masturbation and fingering and blowjobs and all sorts of good stuff! We said our I love yous at 2 months, which had seemed way fast to me before getting into a relationship, but felt totally right now that I was actually in one. It helped that we were at the same college and so able to spend several hours together everyday, and I had a single room so we had lots of time to explore each other physically. We never really had any dates, just hung out. By 3 months I knew I wanted to have sex with him, so I got on birth control, and 4 months into things I lost my virginity and became a certified sex fiend. :-P
Since everything was new to me, he made sure to take things slow. If he made an advance and I acted uncomfortable or unresponsive, he withdrew and would do something that I had previously OKed. We talked about things every step of the way, and about what I felt comfortable with, but I never said, "Okay, I'm going to touch your penis for the first time in two weeks." Pretty much the only thing we planned was intercourse, just because that seemed a much bigger deal to me, and also the whole definitely-not-wanting-a-baby thing. :-P
If he and I were to break up (I hope not! we're headed for 2 years in March, yay) and I were to get involved with someone else, I think probably my only criteria for intercourse would be to make sure I was in love and was mutually loved first. For other stuff, I think I would guilty if I did it on the first date, because I wouldn't be sure if it was someone I really trusted and liked. Probably a couple of weeks would go by before orgasms were involved. But I don't think I'd set up a strict schedule.
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-01-19 05:43 am (UTC)Since everything was new to me, he made sure to take things slow. If he made an advance and I acted uncomfortable or unresponsive, he withdrew and would do something that I had previously OKed. We talked about things every step of the way, and about what I felt comfortable with, but I never said, "Okay, I'm going to touch your penis for the first time in two weeks." Pretty much the only thing we planned was intercourse, just because that seemed a much bigger deal to me, and also the whole definitely-not-wanting-a-baby thing. :-P
If he and I were to break up (I hope not! we're headed for 2 years in March, yay) and I were to get involved with someone else, I think probably my only criteria for intercourse would be to make sure I was in love and was mutually loved first. For other stuff, I think I would guilty if I did it on the first date, because I wouldn't be sure if it was someone I really trusted and liked. Probably a couple of weeks would go by before orgasms were involved. But I don't think I'd set up a strict schedule.