This feeling is totally understandable. When you see a friend in such a situation, it's hard not to feel that it's your job to save her. But it's not. It's her job. It's up to her. You can support her, comfort her, praise her, love her, hold her, listen to her, but you cannot leave him for her or make her leave him. She needs to do that. It sucks, it's hard, it's miserable to be a friend watching this happen. It sounds like you are being an amazing, supportive friend -- and that's what you can do. You can let her know you think she is amazing and wonderful and does not deserve to be treated this way. You can be there for her. And you can try, as impossible as it is sometimes, not to judge her decisions. And you can get support for yourself so that you can continue to be a good friend without letting it take over your life or alienate you from her.
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Date: 2006-10-21 03:44 pm (UTC)This feeling is totally understandable. When you see a friend in such a situation, it's hard not to feel that it's your job to save her. But it's not. It's her job. It's up to her. You can support her, comfort her, praise her, love her, hold her, listen to her, but you cannot leave him for her or make her leave him. She needs to do that. It sucks, it's hard, it's miserable to be a friend watching this happen. It sounds like you are being an amazing, supportive friend -- and that's what you can do. You can let her know you think she is amazing and wonderful and does not deserve to be treated this way. You can be there for her. And you can try, as impossible as it is sometimes, not to judge her decisions. And you can get support for yourself so that you can continue to be a good friend without letting it take over your life or alienate you from her.