Just painful sex!

[pinkgatorgirl06.livejournal.com]

Whenever my boyfriend and I have sex, it's almost always painful. It's almost like my body isn't really producing much natural lube, which is probably caused by my BC. But other than that, it's always just PAINFUL. It's hard to get in, and once it IS in....I don't even know how to describe it. It's uncomfortable, it chafes, and it always feels like he's banging into something on my right side (almost like he is hitting an ovary), and sometimes afterwards it causes almost period like cramps in my lower abdomen. Sometimes it freaks me out because I think I'm starting my period earlier because of these weird cramps. It usually just hurts me in general. I haven't been to the Doc yet, I go in November, I was just wondering if anyone else has weird symptoms like this and what they might be related too...? I've been told I show a lot of signs for endometriosis and also vagismus.


*edit* We use lube, and lots of it everytime, and it doesn't just hurt initially, it hurts the entire time.

Comments

[pinkgatorgirl06.livejournal.com]

heehee yeah we do...we just use regular KY

[scien.livejournal.com]

KY liquid or gel? I've never tried the liquid, but the gel sucketh in a serious way. Either way, I suggest paying a visit to a sex shop and finding a lube that's actually nice.

It might also be a good idea to get a doctor's opinion, just in case there's anything medical that you need to be aware of eg a tilted uterus. Even if they don't find anything, they should know who to refer you on to. It sounds like you're doing all the right things, so there's not much we can help you with over LJ. Best of luck :)

(Standard advice, just in case: take it slowly, be very turned on before you even think of starting, then turn yourself on some more, start with small things, combine with pleasurable stimulation, don't push through pain if you know it won't be any different, better to take it too slowly than too fast, do regular kegel excercises (http://www.bbc.co.uk/relationships/sex_and_sexual_health/exercise_pelvicw.shtml) to learn how to consciously relax your pelvic floor. While none of these will hurt, they aren't gonna solve a medical problem, so get thee to the doctor).

[pinkgatorgirl06.livejournal.com]

We use the liquid, we've never really tried the gel. I forgot to mention that I DO have a tilter uterus, plus oogles of symptoms of Endo. I was just wondering what else there could be.

[scien.livejournal.com]

I'm no doctor and haven't researched either of those in depth, but as far as I'm aware both can cause pain. I'd definitely advise going to see a doctor about it and asking what can be done.

[scien.livejournal.com]

Oh... and definitely don't bother with the gel! ew.

[cityofgods.livejournal.com]

I deleted my comment about using lube....you're more than likely tensing up and thats making it harder to get in, unless you DO have something like vagismus...which from what I know is quite rare. If you're really concerned then a doctor would be a good idea.

[pinkgatorgirl06.livejournal.com]

we've been together for four years...you'd think I wouldn't be tense after so long!

[cityofgods.livejournal.com]

I don't think it has anything to do with that. I'm in a long term relationship (4 years as well) and I still tense up occasionally. Its just out of habit.

Those are the only things I can think of, go see a doctor if you don't think those are the problems.

[thebohomama.livejournal.com]

haha Jessica: "we use lube, and lots of it".

Did you try going to the UF student health services? You can go for free and probably get in before November.

[pinkgatorgirl06.livejournal.com]

great now i got candi readin up on my sex life! lol not like i didnt inform you already...etc. lol but the health services at UF scare me. I went there once and they told me that I just had a cold and I ended up with strep throat for a week and a half!

[thebohomama.livejournal.com]

bastards!

[astarlitnight.livejournal.com]

Same thing happened to me after I went on the pill. For the record, KY didn't help us at all. I'd use astroglide, I think it works wonders.
Eh, it honestly never got all that much better for me, and I eventually just went off the pill. I never see boyface anyway, cause he lives so far away. Poo.

[frolicnaked.livejournal.com]

You might be interested in checking out VP's tagged posts (http://community.livejournal.com/vaginapagina/tag/pain-during-sex) on the subject; perhaps something there will help you out. :)

[paperstar19.livejournal.com]

Some women find that when they relax their mouths, their vagina's also loosen up. Maybe try that next time?

[brina-is-sassy.livejournal.com]

Why do you continue to have sex if you're in pain the whole time?!?!?! Stop having sex and find out what the problem is before you do it again. It doesn't make any sense to keep doing something that isn't comfortable and hurts. If it's all about satisfying him, that makes no sense. Anyone who will let you go through pain for their satisfaction sucks. LOL (Not saying that's the case for sure but I'm throwing that out there in case it is) there are other ways to satisfy him until November anyways, if that is the case.

[deepbluemermaid.livejournal.com]

It could be vaginismus, but that often actually prevents penetration. It could also possibly be vestibulodynia AKA vulvar vestibulitis AKA provoked vulvodynia (the damn doctors keep changing the name...we call it VVS for short). This means that the area just around the vaginal entrance, especially at the back, is totally oversensitive. Initial penetration hurts, and the thrusting can also be painful. But VVS wouldn't explain the pain inside, on the right, or the cramps. That could be more consistent with endo.

I would tend to agree with the commenter above: continuing to have sex, despite all this pain, probably isn't doing you any good. Even if it's a physical problem originally, you could be setting up a vicious cycle: sex hurts => you fear sex, consciously or unconsciously => muscles tighten up automatically => sex hurts even more!