Issues with Penetration

[moonlightblack.livejournal.com]

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Angle of cervix? Penetrative sex problems.

[hide-away-away.livejournal.com]

Hi, so I posted a little while ago wanting some help and once again everyone was awesome here, but I get all shy and never say thanks, so firstly, thank you. This is my account just for here, I'm that awkward haha.

Anyway so I did mention before about having pain when trying to have penetrative sex, I'm technically a virgin I guess, cause I've never properly had penetrative sex. I haven't tried a lot, but with my last partner he is large and it just wasn't happening without so bad pain that I had to stop. Even with lots of lube. People here mentioned things like latex allergy which I am actually going to look into (forgot to mention it to the nurse but I plan to my next visit).

However, I did have a smear test today (is it what they call a pap test in the usa? I know we call it a cervical smear but I've not seen that phrase used on here much), and when she first tried to do it, I was in a lot of pain and she stopped, and she said that I needed to relax (which I think is probably my main problem I guess, because it's starting to become an issue). She also said though that my cervix was angled down and that it was fine, all different shapes and she was going to use a different thing (speculum is it?) to do it with. She didn't seem concerned or confused, just went straight to her cupboard and grabbed something else. The speculum thing looked exactly the same to me so guessed it was just angled differently, that seemed to be what she said. Unless it was just smaller?

At the time (y'know, with my legs open feeling less than comfortable!) I didn't think too deeply about it, but when she used this different one it didn't hurt even in the slightest, and I'm not convinced I was anymore relaxed. It just felt more normal where the other way it felt like someone was forcing something somewhere it can't go, and that's what it feels like with penetrative sex, it just isn't happening, yet my partner has commented he doesn't really get how can have fingers in there and it not hurt the same, so I am starting to wonder if there is an angle issue? Or is it literally just going to be a size thing because I'm not relaxing.

Is the thing she used likely to just be a smaller one or is it likely that it could actually be to do with the angle of me, does that vary in women? Does anyone have any experience of this? I'm just wondering if I need to maybe focus on different positions in sex to try and solve this problem of not being able to have penetrative sex, but I don't know much about it. Everything I found on google seemed to be about having babies, which isn't really a concern for me right now, but maybe if you have some search tips or links I'd be happy with that.

I'm 25 (I may have altered my age slightly last time I posted on here as I was concerned someone I know seeing it!) so I really need to get over my awkwardness and should've just asked the nurse, I'm fine with a partner and happily chat to him about anything, but it's just different with a complete stranger. Thinking I might try to see my nurse more times because then I will feel more comfortable asking her.

I was just wondering if anyone has any experience of what I'm talking about, it could be complete rubbish and I'm ready for someone to tell me that I need biology lessons or something, but I guess I'm just searching for solutions for this problem and the smear test did make me think. It didn't look much smaller so I am assuming it was angled differently, but then I've never heard of that at all!

Thank you in advance for any help/advice. I'm not sure what tags to use if some could advice or tag this for me? I hope my subject line is descriptive enough too. Thank you.

My partner won't/hasn't gotten tested?

[lurne.livejournal.com]

After a year of us dating (and me insisting he get tested), my boyfriend still hasn't gotten tested.
It's not that he's refused outright, he just keeps saying he will when he doesn't. We're both in the same major, so I know that he's insanely busy but I just feel like there's a certain lack of respect. I've been suffering for a year with a mysterious itchiness and multiple UTIs, and him not getting tested makes me feel really bad about having to keep reminding him.

Just on the relationship itself... I know it's not directly related to health issues, but I've been feeling bad about the whole relationship. We've both acknowledged the fact that we want to be in a long-term committed relationship and have a life together, but I don't feel like he does what he says. We get along really well, but I feel like he's not equally invested in the relationship. Is it possible that we just are invested in it, differently? Can anyone give me some perspective on this? :(

Nausea during period....?

[https://users.livejournal.com/pretendworld-/]

I recently stopped birth control (Estelle 35-ED) after being on it for several years (with a couple of brief breaks during that time) and today I started my first period since coming off BC. It began with the usual cramping but has gradually turned into a feeling of nausea and general 'yuck' sensation in my stomach. My flow is light to normal and I've taken pain relief for the cramping. Never experienced this before. I was thinking it was just my IBS or something but now I'm not so sure. Any ideas? This has never happened before, I'm 24 yo cis-female, not sexually active if that makes any difference? And the whole reason I'm being so paranoid is that I have emetophobia (fear of vomiting) so any and all potential scenarios scare me :-/