(no subject)

[pianese.livejournal.com]

I know this is probably going to be a stupid "you're completely normal" type of question..but it's just been weighing on my mind a lot lately, and I would really appreciate some input from you ladies. Now, this isn't an "Am I pregnant?" question, but more like a "Why hasn't it happened?"

I've been with my current boyfriend for about a year now. We've used protection I wanna say maybe the first time we had sex, but after that we haven't used any..no condoms, birth control, or any other type of it..and he's ejaculated inside me just about every time. It's really starting to get me worried that I haven't gotten pregnant yet. We are both in a good place in our relationship, where if I did find out we were going to have a baby we both would be very excited..but we still feel like if it doesn't happen, its not a problem either. But right now, I'm really having that "baby fever", I feel like right now would be a good time to become a mother, and I find it such a blessing. 

Heres a little background about me & him: I have never been positive for any stds, although a few years ago he was positive from trichamosis [I'm almost positive thats either not spelled right, or not even the right word but its something like that], we do both have been semi stressed out for a few months, but its not over the top. He does smoke, which is probably one contributing factor.. I just don't know. I do understand that sometimes its just not 'meant to be' or whatever, but i'd just like some reassurance about what y'all think about it.

Any information or opinions you have is greatly appreciated! Thank you so much. 

[edit] Also mods, I tried to put a subject in the subject line, but my computer keeps messing up whenever i try to fill things in, like in the subject line..It just closes out my browser.. I'm not sure why it's been happening, but it's not just been on LJ its been doing it to me. So, I am very sorry about that.

Comments

[archangelbeth]

When using no protection, about 85% of people are expected to be pregnant in a year. However, this means 15% won't be. That's 15 out of every 100 people having unprotected sex -- and you might just be one of the 15.

Also note that between 40%-60% of all pregnancies will naturally miscarry in the first trimester, and the majority of those are "chemical pregnancies" -- the DNA in egg and sperm just doesn't fuse correctly and the blastocyst stops developing. If you aren't testing for pregnancy all the time, you might just have a slightly late "period."

It's also possible that your boyfriend has a low enough sperm count to weight the odds -- does he wear tight undies or sit with a hot laptop in his lap, or take hot hot-tubbing soaks? The testicles dangle because sperm aren't happy being stored at full body-temperature.

You may want to chart your own fertility, according to fam technique. If you weren't ovulating regularly, or if you had a very short luteal phase (the time between ovulation and your period), that could impact matters. If you have irregular periods, that could indicate a fertility-affecting condition such as hypothyroidism (irregular ovulation, plus anecdotal increased chance of miscarriage, if not managed) or PCOS.

But if none of that seems likely? Approximately 15 out of 100 people aren't pregnant, even after a year of unprotected sex.

[atalanta0jess.livejournal.com]

I've always wondered about these stats. I mean, ok...15/100 aren't pregnant after a year. Not to be a bummer to the OP, but that doesn't mean 15/100 perfectly fertile people aren't pregnant after a year, at least as far as I know. I wonder how many of those 15 have some sort of issue that makes it more difficult to get pregnant, versus just not getting pregnant because of chance.

But OP, don't listen to me and conclude that you're going to have problems getting pregnant either! Plenty of people take over a year and still go on to have pregnancies. :)

[archangelbeth]

It's an interesting question, whether the 15 have a fertility issue or not. On the other hand, the definition of "Sexually active" isn't entirely clear, either -- if one is only having sex a few times a month, one could skip the window of fertility, for instance.

And on another hand, I was one of the 85% who fell pregnant within a year of not really "trying" besides ditching all contraception -- and that was with untreated hypothyroidism and the resulting somewhat iffy periods. So one has to incorporate me into those statistics, too. O:>

[nickelshoe.livejournal.com]

Hubby and I took stopped using contraception in like 2008. We had a miscarriage in 2009 and conceived our daughter in 2010. We weren't actively trying to conceive all that time, but it took about a year when we were trying. We weren't trying very hard, though. I charted my basal body temperature, but if we weren't in the mood when I expected to ovulate, then we didn't have sex. In fact, if you look at my charts, we pretty much always managed to miss my fertile time. My cycles aren't very regular, and temping can only tell you you've ovulated after the fact. The cycle we conceived our daughter was one of the first times we actually timed it right.

So if you're not having sex several times a week, it's actually possible to time it wrong for a whole year.

[dammit-morgan.livejournal.com]

Also interested in responses, I'm in a similar situation and still no pregnancy.

[madraykin.livejournal.com]

you're only actually able to conceive for about 3-4 days every month, those times are when the vagina is most hospitable to sperm. So, for example you could happen to have unprotected sex during your fertile period and sperm makes it through the cervix and into your uterus but chooses the ovary that you didn't ovulate from - the egg or the sperm dies before the sperm can make it all the way back.
Your egg only lives for 24 hours after it's released and like Beth said, egg and sperm can meet but for whatever reason the fertilized egg doesn't implant properly.
I really wouldn't worry about it unless you've actively been trying for a while; I engaged in unsafe sex with my first partner and I never got pregnant but I am pregnant now.

[blewoutthestars.livejournal.com]

Most of this has been said before but - for quite a lot of people who are actively trying to concieve it can take quite a while, so if you're not actively trying to have sex during your fertile times then it is perfectly possible that you just haven't happened to conceive.

As Beth said, if you're interested then using the fertility awareness method might help you - even if you just realise that you haven't often been having sex during your fertile days or whatever.

I would say not to worry because it sounds like you have a good possibility that you just haven't happened to conceive. However, if you're still concerned (like if you HAVE been having sex during your fertile period most months) and you're able to, you could always have a talk with your doctor and get a proper medical opinion.

[whatever4.livejournal.com]

You can get the Ovulation Test from different stores. I have seen them at Dollar Tree and saw that they have good reviews online.... The test is taken the same way as a pregnancy test, but it tells you if you are ovulating so you know when you should have sex. I just currently started trying to get pregnant, but I probably just have to wait until I get my period again so I can start timing it and texting for ovulation.. When I am not on birth control, I get my period at random times.. I sometimes skip 3 months in a row.. So I am guessing I will have a difficult time getting pregnant.
I also know you can go to the doctor or hospital and get a more accurate test done to know when you are ovulating. I have not done this yet, but I may if I don't get pregnant within the next 6 months or so.

[pianese.livejournal.com]

Thank you everyone for all of the great information! I think it could be a possibility I could have miscarried and not noticed. I should have mentioned, I do chart my periods, it's on an app..it also tells you your expected ovulation date, but it has different options if you know when it comes, but i kept it on the default setting because I am not sure how to figure out when it happens... uhm.. okay and i've been keeping track of it since oct 09, and my periods have ranged all the way from 16 days to 39 days. Also, most months we have had sex about half of the days the month, and almost always we have sex around the "expected ovulation" date.. 2 days give or take and/or on the day. I don't know.. I'm not sure how "fertile" he is.. I know he had that condition when he was born where one of his testicles didnt drop? and had surgery for it and whatnot.. That may be a contributing factor also. I don't know.. it's probably a combination of both of us. Butttt, thank you alll so much for all of your imput!