Your first question is kind of a tricky one. Some people would say that having been vaginally penetrated by a penis means the end of virginity. Others will counter that non-PIV sexual contact can still be sex. Still others will argue that "virginity" is an outmoded patriarchal cultural concept anyway!
For many of us, our first sexual contact isn't quite so cut-and-dried as it perhaps was in centuries past. Most of us don't go from no sex to full PIV intercourse on our wedding nights, anymore - we might have various levels of contact, some light, some quite involved, before we have what we consider a true "having sex" experience. So the lines are blurred in more ways than one, which I would say is another argument for the obsolescence of the term "virginity."
From all this, I would say - decide for yourself! Do you feel like you have become a sexually active person, who has had an experience that you'd call sex, or do you feel like that's yet to come?
About the hymen - the absence or presence of hymens doesn't necessarily have anything to do with sexual activity. Many, many girls have partially or completely lost theirs long before they became sexually active. And there are women whose hymens have remained in place despite having had plenty of penetration from tampons, fingers, penises, toys, whatever. It just doesn't have much to do with anything.
Sexual activity can muddle a bit with your body - if you were due to start bleeding and haven't, it could be due to the new activity. It can also be due to stress about the same :)
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Date: 2008-05-20 11:21 pm (UTC)For many of us, our first sexual contact isn't quite so cut-and-dried as it perhaps was in centuries past. Most of us don't go from no sex to full PIV intercourse on our wedding nights, anymore - we might have various levels of contact, some light, some quite involved, before we have what we consider a true "having sex" experience. So the lines are blurred in more ways than one, which I would say is another argument for the obsolescence of the term "virginity."
From all this, I would say - decide for yourself! Do you feel like you have become a sexually active person, who has had an experience that you'd call sex, or do you feel like that's yet to come?
About the hymen - the absence or presence of hymens doesn't necessarily have anything to do with sexual activity. Many, many girls have partially or completely lost theirs long before they became sexually active. And there are women whose hymens have remained in place despite having had plenty of penetration from tampons, fingers, penises, toys, whatever. It just doesn't have much to do with anything.
Sexual activity can muddle a bit with your body - if you were due to start bleeding and haven't, it could be due to the new activity. It can also be due to stress about the same :)