It could just be an inflamed oil gland or something. It's not uncommon at all to get boils and irritated glands down there.
That said, in the event that it is HSV, one thing to remember is that it's possible to transmit oral HSV (better known as cold sores) to the genitals via oral sex, if you guys have been engaging in oral sex.
The large majority of the population has oral HSV, whether they know it or not -- tons of people get it and never have an outbreak, or else they had their only outbreak as a child and don't remember.
Or else he may have contracted genital HSV prior to dating you, and never had an outbreak. Has he ever gotten a blood test for HSV? If not, there's no way to know whether he has it or not.
One thing I will agree with is that you deserve much more support than your partner is giving you. It sounds like he is uninformed and judgmental about STIs. Bottom line? Almost everyone has HSV in some form; and a huge chunk of the population has it genitally.
HSV is not "disgusting." If you do have HSV, then you are not disgusting. It's just a virus that causes inconvenient outbreaks from time to time. It's fundamentally no different than any other virus.
If you can, don't be afraid to stand up to your partner and demand better treatment from him. If he's willing to end the relationship over this -- when it isn't even confirmed to be HSV -- it may be a blessing in disguise for you. You deserve a partner that's willing to learn about possible conditions with you and support you through it.
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Date: 2008-10-02 02:13 am (UTC)That said, in the event that it is HSV, one thing to remember is that it's possible to transmit oral HSV (better known as cold sores) to the genitals via oral sex, if you guys have been engaging in oral sex.
The large majority of the population has oral HSV, whether they know it or not -- tons of people get it and never have an outbreak, or else they had their only outbreak as a child and don't remember.
Or else he may have contracted genital HSV prior to dating you, and never had an outbreak. Has he ever gotten a blood test for HSV? If not, there's no way to know whether he has it or not.
One thing I will agree with is that you deserve much more support than your partner is giving you. It sounds like he is uninformed and judgmental about STIs. Bottom line? Almost everyone has HSV in some form; and a huge chunk of the population has it genitally.
HSV is not "disgusting." If you do have HSV, then you are not disgusting. It's just a virus that causes inconvenient outbreaks from time to time. It's fundamentally no different than any other virus.
If you can, don't be afraid to stand up to your partner and demand better treatment from him. If he's willing to end the relationship over this -- when it isn't even confirmed to be HSV -- it may be a blessing in disguise for you. You deserve a partner that's willing to learn about possible conditions with you and support you through it.