Date: 2007-10-29 06:32 pm (UTC)
Well, here's my personal standpoint: while I think wanting to pleasure a sexual partner is a great thing, I personally feel that whether or not you decide to have sex should depend on what you want for yourself, not solely on the other person's pleasure.

Performing oral sex isn't for everyone. I personally love performing oral sex on my partners, and it's part of my belief that a healthy sexual relationship and healthy romantic relationship includes loving and accepting your partner's body from head to toe.

That doesn't mean you should perform oral sex if you don't want to -- and there's certainly no "order" for sexual experience -- but I do think that it's important to be psychologically comfortable with a penis, and accept it as a part of his body and sexual function, before having penetrative sex.

After all, this is a body part that will potentially be inside of your vagina -- which can be a very intimate and even vulnerable feeling -- and if you have feelings that it is "gross" or unpleasant, that might not make for a great experience for you.

My personal advice might be to try and experiment more with your partner before deciding to have penetrative sex. That doesn't need to include oral sex, but it certainly can't hurt to get to know more about his penis and become more familiar with it. Have fun with it, and learn more about how each other's bodies work!

As for the first time -- well, as many people will tell you, it's pretty common to have no idea what to do your first time! I know I didn't, and many men and women didn't either. :)

Remember though, there's no one "way to do sex." The basics are there -- penetrate the penis with the vagina, and include thrusting... but things like positions, how you want to move or react is something that can take time and experimentation.

That's part of why being very familiar and comfortable with each other's bodies is so important... it helps you "figure it out," so to speak. :)

Now that you are considering having intercourse, it would be a great time to sit down with your partner and discuss things like contraceptive options and STI protection. Would you like to use condoms, hormonal birth control, or another method? Do you know how to use those methods correctly -- for instance, how to properly put on a condom to ensure it doesn't break?

Then there's other things -- like do you want to use store-bought lubricant to ease penetration? What position would you like to try first... missionary is obviously a basic, but a lot of people enjoy girl-on-top for a first-time experience. Now's a great time to find out all that stuff so that when you do decide to have sex, you're prepared. :)
This account has disabled anonymous posting.
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.
More info about formatting

February 2019

S M T W T F S
     12
3456789
10111213141516
17181920212223
242526 2728  

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags