vaginapagina | Self image issues....

Self image issues....

Is anyone else really uncomfortable with how their vagina looks, specifically the mons pubis? I've always felt that mine was grossly out of proportion to my body, and it seems a lot larger compared to what I've seen on other women. I originally thought it was because I was overweight (I weighed 180 lbs at age 16), but I made a major lifestyle change and lost 40 lbs. I've lost a lot of inches around my waist, my tummy is a lot more flat, but I didn't notice any change in my mons pubis. I was sorely disappointed. :( Now I feel even more out of proportion!

Anyone else have self image issues like this?

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Yes, my mons is a chubby one as well. I think it's a bit funny but no guy has ever minded; in fact it's been called cute more than once. Now I feel a bit protective of my "fat pussy" :) I don't think you should feel inadequate because of it - genitals really do come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. (Or course I have to remind myself that about other body areas I feel bad about - chubby tummy [and I am not chubby], small boobs, etc., so I relate wholeheartedly.)

Just think - you have more padding for some intense crotch grinding. :)

mine is HUGE by comparison to the rest of me. If I'm wearing just panties and lying on my back, it looks like i've a pad in there. My hubby thinks it's the cutest thing ever and i used to be self-conscience about it, but i have no idea how to lose weight right there, so i've learned to live with it. ;)

I don't have the same problem, but I have really long inner labia and practically non-existent outer labia, and for a long time I was super insecure about it. I've learned to love my body for what it is, but I still get frustrated when the pictures I see don't remotely resemble me. Even in the Everyday Bodies Project, well there are many pictures of long labia, none of the "front view" variety of pictures looks a thing like I do when I stand in front of the mirror and it kind of freak me out.

Part of the problem is that we don't really know what our vulvas are supposed to look like, since we don't really see any but our own, and art, pornography, and medical pictures don't really provide a good span of the variety out there. Take a look at the EBP, and spend a little time with your vulva with a hand mirror. The more I've done this, the more comfortable I've become.

If you'd like to see someone who looks like you in the Everyday Bodies Project, maybe you could send in a photo (provided you're over 18, of course)? I'm sure you're not alone, and yet sometimes people who are a little unusual are also a lot shy. If you're up for it, one way to get more representation of a body like yours is to send in a photo! If not, no worries, I understand there are a lot of reasons for not wanting to share an intimate photograph like that. :}

I should, but I haven't seen any calls for vulva photos recently, and I have to be in a particular kind of mood to send strangers intimate pictures....

I don't know that we've put out any specific calls for photos lately, but I think we could probably add one more photo, especially in this case. I'm one of the maintainers here, but not the one who primarily takes care of the Everyday Bodies Project - so I can't say for sure, but I can say it's worth checking. :} If you wanted to check on this, email the team at vpteam@vaginapagina.com.

Just to chime in and clarify, EBP is currently accepting submissions of Butts, Bellies and Full Bodies (linky to recent EBP Post), though I'm always happy to add a vulva to the 2.0 finale post :)

How can I view it? I'm a member of this group but I can't seem to see it.

Do you have VP friended (it's separate from being a member)? If you go to "manage friends" you can make VP a friend and view it. Let me know if you need more help :)

Mine is bigger as well, though it's in proportion at the moment since I'm a more-to-love girl. I used to think it was HUGE and horrible, and I'm still not totally comfortable with it. BUT, I know there are plenty of slimmer woman who have chubby mons pubis', my sister being one of them.

I second taking a look at all the Everyday Bodies Project to see what other woman have there. At the end of the day, there are billions of vaginas in this world and you are deifnitely not the only one with a bigger mons, nor are you the only woman who isn't comfortable with it, so you're not in the boat alone! :]

Not every woman's vulva looks like what you see in most pornographic or media representations and unless you have an arm or leg growing out of your mons then I would say it's fairly normal.

I've also become more comfortable with my vulva through looking at it in a mirror :]

I hope you find some ways to become more comfortable with yourself in this area. Good luck!

Since others have mentioned VP's Everyday Bodies project, I just wanted to link you to the final Everyday Vulvas (http://community.livejournal.com/vaginapagina/8905020.html) collage. As you can probably guess from the title, it contains pictures of many, many vulvae and as such, is probably not terribly safe for work. :)

This is actually a really interesting question, because I think that's one aspect of the female body we don't talk about much.

Though I've never really thought too deeply about it, I suppose I always found mine sort of uncomfortable looking as well, but for a slightly different reason: I'm extremely thin, and my mons sticks out quite a bit further than the rest of my lower stomach. I always think it looks like I stuffed a baseball down the front of my torso! It's not padded with anything... it's just bone and skin... but it definitely has its own definable shape. I'm sort of used to it though. :)

Not about the mons, but the vulva in general... I used to not like mine. It didn't look like the "perfect" ones I'd seen in porn, and I've never seen a REAL naked woman. But after being with my boyfriend and him not ever having a complaint, I figured it was normal. This was confirmed by the Everyday Bodies project here on VP. Now I like my vulva simply because it's MINE.

All vaginas are different. I love the VP Everyday Bodies Project in that respect, you get to see so many different vaginas and chances are, one will look like yours.

After I had my son, I hated the look of my genitals. My stretch marks went all the way down to my mons (I had polyhydramniosis - probably spelled wrong, sorry - and I was HUGE with a massive low belly). Then I had an emergency c section and when they sewed up the scar, I thought it made the skin on my mons look saggy.

I got used to it, by telling myself it was a: for a good reason and b: realising that don't nobody gonna tell me that my cunt aint pretty, no matter what it looks like.

Don't look at porn and glamour models for examples of what genitals look like. They're a very slim section of the population, and a lot of photos are edited anyway.

If you really struggle with this, to the point where you'd consider getting it cosmetically corrected, I'd recommend seeing a therapist. They can do wonders with self esteem and body issues.

Honestly, I've seen many genitals (I watch porn, have done work experience in the gyn field and am bisexual) and I've never in my life seen an ugly vagina, and doubt I ever will. I'm sure yours is pretty too, so love it. It deserves it.

So what if it looks out of proportion? I'm sure no one will notice, and any partners you have will love it (and if they don't, get rid of them!). Stupid stereotypes of what genitals 'should' look like are irrelevant really. I used to hate my vulva because my inner labia are longer than my outer labia. The EBP helped me to realise that at least 30% of womens vulvaes are like this, and that they can be pretty too. When a man told me that he thought my cunt didn't look pretty because my inner labia were unevenly long, I told him to leave and said I'd hope the door would hit him in the ass on the way out!

Not pretty?

What an asshole. So, so glad you told (not asked) him to leave :)

Hell yeah. Like I said, I love my cunt and everyone else that's with me needs to love it too.

You know, I'm so glad I've become the same way!

I used to have that "grateful" complex that a lot of young, insecure girls do, so I put up with a lot of shit that nobody deserves.

These days? If you're a guy who's not simply drooling at the mouth in anticipation to shove his face in my crotch....don't bother knocking at the door. and that's the truth.

Amen to that! I used to be in the same icky headspace, be grateful for what I can get etc. Then I realised, hey I'm a good person, I can get and deserve better. So I went out and got it!

Mind if I add you?

I don't have a "chubby" mons, but it's really wide - like it's thinking about defecting to my upper thighs and has sent out a scouting party of pubic hair (which I loving call the Sas-crotch). My labia minora are also asymmetrical, leftie is about three times the length of rightie. I think it's cool. I guess that old perfume ad was right - he really would know you, even in the dark. :P

As far as your weight loss goes, I was under the impression that you can't really slim down the mons pubis area through diet or exercise. There isn't really a muscle there to tone or tighten, as it's just a pad of fat designed to protect the area.
I am a very small person (83 lbs.) and have always had, what I believe to be an overly padded mons. I was embarrassed for a while, because a partner commented on it a few times.
I dropped him, and now no longer feel the need to look like a porn star.

I lost 135 pounds, and it never really went away from my mons. I think you're really normal!

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