This is just my opinion on the matter so take it for what it's worth. I have a lot of rhetorical questions for you to think through as only you can answer.
If you're touching each other genitally, you really should be having the sexual history/STI talk. When was the last time he got tested and what were the results? Has he fooled around with the ex or anyone else since then? Considering his ex cheated on him, he could be at a higher risk for STI's as he doesn't know who his ex has been with or what sort of protection (if any) she used. While you know you have HSV-1, what have you done to protect yourself from things he might not know?
Secondly, it was hard to tell from your post, but are you looking for a relationship from this man? If you are, I would hold off on sleeping with him. FWB works only if both parties can keep their feelings in check, and it sounds like you're struggling to do so. Also, I think it would be a good exercise to look at why you were being over-dramatic when he wanted to stay at his place instead of yours. You two aren't in a relationship yet and are very casual. Will you feel more jealous if he's fooling around with you but wants a relationship with someone else?
What's the worst that could happen with rejection? He isn't interested in you romantically, he doesn't want to have sex anymore, he doesn't want to be your friend? If he's going to pull away because you have an STI, he is within his rights, and there are other people who will listen to your research and information and will be willing to take that risk with you. I take the approach I'd rather find out, know for sure and deal with the aftermath sooner rather than later instead of dancing around the subject and obsessing about the "what if"s.
no subject
If you're touching each other genitally, you really should be having the sexual history/STI talk. When was the last time he got tested and what were the results? Has he fooled around with the ex or anyone else since then? Considering his ex cheated on him, he could be at a higher risk for STI's as he doesn't know who his ex has been with or what sort of protection (if any) she used. While you know you have HSV-1, what have you done to protect yourself from things he might not know?
Secondly, it was hard to tell from your post, but are you looking for a relationship from this man? If you are, I would hold off on sleeping with him. FWB works only if both parties can keep their feelings in check, and it sounds like you're struggling to do so. Also, I think it would be a good exercise to look at why you were being over-dramatic when he wanted to stay at his place instead of yours. You two aren't in a relationship yet and are very casual. Will you feel more jealous if he's fooling around with you but wants a relationship with someone else?
What's the worst that could happen with rejection? He isn't interested in you romantically, he doesn't want to have sex anymore, he doesn't want to be your friend? If he's going to pull away because you have an STI, he is within his rights, and there are other people who will listen to your research and information and will be willing to take that risk with you. I take the approach I'd rather find out, know for sure and deal with the aftermath sooner rather than later instead of dancing around the subject and obsessing about the "what if"s.
Good luck in your decision.