Anonymous post: Random healing from pain conditions?

[http://users.livejournal.com/__recidivist/]

Greetings, fellow Superstars! As you probably know, from time to time the VP Team makes posts on behalf of people who wish to remain anonymous or who do not have LJ accounts. This is one such post. Thanks in advance for your helpful comments. :)

P.S. For more info on anonymous posts, see this link.

Eli
For the VP Team
contact_vp

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I have 3 years ago I was diagnosed with vulvodynia, vulvar vestibuledynia, and vaginismis. Also for 3 years I have been in an monogamous relationship that I am slowly coming to realise that needs to end. During the duration of my relationship's physical intimacy I could never be penetrated with a finger because of all of my sexual dysfunctions and pain issues. I honestly thought that I would have to get surgery to be able to accommodate any sort of penetration.

I am just going to be honest, and I hope you won't judge me. But I have fallen for someone else and we've become intimate with each other.

I am so used to constantly being in pain during intimacy and being limited to oral and manual stimulation. My body would flinch violently if a finger or tongue went too far down my vulva.

But this is different. So very different. It doesn't hurt. I don't flinch. My new partner can touch me anywhere. I have a labido again. I am having fun. For the first time ever.

One nite on a whim I ask my new partner to try to penetrate me with a finger, which would have normally resulted in intense and unbearable pain. He did, cautiously. And there was nothing! I felt no pain, only pleasure.

Honesty, I never associated penetration with pleasure because I always figured that it would be devoid of sensation and feeling. But even one finger felt amazing! I was amazed and over the moon.

After practising with a finger I just decided to jump right into intercourse. If this was a fluke with a expiration date I wanted to do everything possible. I'm 24, and have been forced into unwanted celibacy and abstainance and I am sick of it.

We've been trying, little by little and it's amazing. Now I are why people want to have sex! It's not awful, or uncomfortable, or boring, or painful. It's fun, sexy and I find myself enjoying it more than I ever thought I would.

Because I am new at this I have some questions:

1. To receive hbc from Planned Parenthood do I need to get a pelvic? I don't think I am ready for that step yet!

2. Out of curiosity why do you think I have miraculously healed?

3. We have located and stimulated my G spot! Yay! Now, how do I come from it?

4. In some positions like me on top and me lying on my tummy and being penetrated from behind causes a burning and intense stretching sensation. It's bearable to a point but the fact that both postions simulate my g spot so well I put up with it, for a while. Is there anyway to alleviate the pain? Or will it subside with time?

Thank you so much for any input you may have!

Comments

[ahota84.livejournal.com]

I think this post shows that sometimes your body tells your mind what to do, and sometimes reverse. While I'm not here to give you obvious and unwanted advice, I think your body is giving you all the advice you need.

I know the amazing feeling getting over vaginismus, and I congratulate your bravery on taking steps to take care of yourself.

However, taking care of your body sexually includes getting a pelvic exam. When you make the appt, tell PP that you are recovering from your illnesses and you need to have a clinician cognizant of this. If you want to be seaxually active, this is an important step. I see no way around it.

Good luck! Enjoy your sexual journey. :)

[blackpuddle.livejournal.com]

I don't have any answers as to why this is but I have all three things that you do and I've had multiple partners over the years. And some of them I've had very little problems with and others I'd have tons of problems with pain. I still haven't figured out why. And certain positions definetly hurt more than others.

[a-tiny-goat.livejournal.com]

I've been to two different Planned Parenthoods - one in Nowhere, WI and one in Chicago, IL, and both of them offered birth control consults so you can get birth control without the pelvic exam. They talk to you about your period, sexual practices, take your height, weight & blood pressure..

At my last consult, they tried to tell me that I "needed" (aka in her professional opinion, but was not requiring me to have one) one because you need to have a pap every year. Because I have had multiple, negative yearly tests, I told her that I thought I was good to have one every three years as some places practice, and that shut her up.

[delia43.livejournal.com]

I do agree with the need to have PAP's though. Catching HPV infections early reduces the risk of developing of cervical cancer enormously. HPV strains that cause cervical cancer is incredibly pervasive and you can have it without ever knowing it because it doesn't cause bumps like other HPV strains do.

Also, every PP and OBGYN I've ever known has a smaller sized speculum they can use if asked, if that helps.

[ajsuram.livejournal.com]

Congratulations on your success!
I too had to struggle with vaginismus, and it's just the most amazing feeling when you realize what this "sex thingy" is all about!

(frozen)

[misfit4leaf.livejournal.com]

I really hope you're not with that poor guy that's made multiple worried post about his girlfriend's inability to handle any kind of penetration. I'm shaking my head because your story sounds the same as the story he gave everytime he posted to VP for guidance to help you.

(frozen)

[atalanta0jess.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure how this comment is helpful to the OP? I understand if you feel for that dude who posts here sometimes. But I don't think that's any reason to shake your head at the OP...just because someone seems great or even IS great doesn't mean their relationship is perfect, or right for them. Sometimes people just aren't right for each other.

(frozen)

[frolicnaked.livejournal.com]

While I can understand being sympathetic to and concerned about other VP members, given that the post in question is from a different person, I think it's important to respect the fact that the focus of this post is about this individual's concerns and needs.

I'm kind of interpreting your phrasing here -- "I really hope you're not with..." -- as taking the focus off of the OP's actual questions to talk about something that may or may not apply to them, and I'm concerned they may feel this is dismissive of what they're actually going through and asking about.

(frozen) Maintainer Note: Safe Space Warning

[poppleshatesyou.livejournal.com]

Hi, misfit4leaf. We're commenting because your attitude and wording do not foster what we consider safe space (http://www.vaginapagina.com/index.php?title=VaginaPagina_FAQ#What_is_.22Safe_Space.22.3F_What_does_.22empowerment.22_mean.3F) here in the community.

Specifically we feel your comment is inappropriate because it is making unhelpful and unwarranted assumptions about an anonymous poster, and is dismissive of the actual concerns mentioned in this post.

If you'd like more information on safe space (http://www.vaginapagina.com/index.php?title=VaginaPagina_FAQ#What_is_.22Safe_Space.22.3F_What_does_.22empowerment.22_mean.3F), please refer to these items in our FAQ (http://www.vaginapagina.com/index.php?title=VaginaPagina_FAQ):

--What are VP's rules? (http://www.vaginapagina.com/index.php?title=VaginaPagina_FAQ#What_are_the_rules.3F)
--What is "safe space"? What does "empowerment" mean? (http://www.vaginapagina.com/index.php?title=VaginaPagina_FAQ#What_is_.22Safe_Space.22.3F_What_does_.22empowerment.22_mean.3F)

You are more than welcome to make a post over in contact_vp or to contact us via email (http://www.vaginapagina.com/contact.php) If you'd like to talk more about this matter or clarify any points; we only ask that you refrain from commenting further here out of respect for the OP. For that reason, replies to this thread will be frozen.

Caroline
For the VP Team (http://www.vaginapagina.com/contact.php)
contact_vp

[atalanta0jess.livejournal.com]

I have heard of people experiencing pain during intercourse only with a specific partner. Sometimes I think its just a matter of your body telling you things that your brain is not quite ready to recognize.

In any case, congrats on being healed! :D

[britasaurus-rex.livejournal.com]

I just want to say I'm REALLY REALLY HAPPY FOR YOU!!! I have never experienced the conditions you described, and I cannot imagine how difficult they must have been. But I CAN identify with the pure joy of overcoming a road black. Congrats!!!!

I think this is a great example of "mind over body." Perhaps you feel safer and more relaxed and loved with your new partner, which has allowed your body to relax and allow penetration.

As far as G-spot orgasm, that takes practice. It's something I'm still working on. Keep up the G-spot massage (I read the orgasm is easier to achieve by his fingers than by his dick, he can control the motions better) and its all about LETTING GO, which sometimes takes practice to reach that level of relaxation.

As far as number 4, I think that comes down to just maintaining your level of relaxation. But if they are uncomfortable, try a different position, and rely on finger stimulation for g-spot massage.

Congrats again!

[ladycat.livejournal.com]

Rar! Congratulations! I've had a similar experience, pain with some partners, but not others. Pain with some at certain times, or doing certain things, but not others. I've got no idea why, but you're not alone.